The different approaches to the baby's lap can confuse new mothers. Some approaches favor the baby being held in as little arms as possible so that the baby does not get used to the lap and the mother is comfortable. On the contrary, some approaches offer mothers an almost conjoined life for as long as their babies are still in the womb. Psychologist and Special Education Specialist Bihter Mutlu Gencer, Mek In fact, it is not plausible to propose a single formula to hold the baby, because each baby is different, and every mother has a relationship with the baby. This particular relationship is determined by the embrace, ”he says.
As soon as the baby falls into the mother's belly (perhaps much earlier), it begins to have a place in the mother's mind. This “place ir is determined by the mother's own psychological state, her feelings about having a baby, her preparation, her own infancy and upbringing, her relationship with her parents, and her relationship with her husband. The more worried the mother herself is about having a baby, the more harmonious she is with her husband, and the less emotional conflicts she has with her childhood, the more likely her baby is to remain calm. If the mother feels comfortable and peaceful, there will be a natural process to meet the baby's needs. If the needs are met, the baby becomes more peaceful and calm. The world, which was initially very new and incomprehensible to the baby, perhaps dangerous, began to gradually turn into a safe place thanks to the care and love of the mother. Thus, a basic sense of trust is formed. As the basic sense of trust develops and calms down, the infant, who initially wanted a continuous hug, could no longer tolerate being separated. Because now she knows that when she needs it again, the mother will be there to meet her needs.
Sense of trust matters
The baby develops a basic sense of confidence and spends more time apart from the mother. He starts to notice his surroundings. He begins to smile, crawl, walk, and explore the world. The mother, who is in love with her, realizes the new needs of the baby and starts to leave her naturally more. When she cried and gave her breast as soon as she cried, she might now allow her baby to whimper for a few minutes to put out her food on the stove. Of course, it cannot be said that the baby's temperament is of no importance for this period, but no matter how hard the baby calms down, even with a mother's care and care, even a difficult baby can develop a harmony between her and mother over time. The mother adapts to her baby and the baby adapts to her mother. This is why mothers understand when their baby cries and how they cry and the tone of voice.
When we consider all these, we see that there is not a single formula for each baby that should be held for the following minutes. Some babies want to be kept on the lap and some babies can stay separate. If the baby's psychological development is on its way, we expect that as time goes on, it will require less hug. On the other hand, it is also important to know the stages of child development. For example, around 7-8 months the baby develops fear of foreigners and the baby may want more hugs. Between 18 and 24 months, the mother will re-adhere and may need more arms. These situations are completely normal.
It's not right not to hold her.
For infants who have not been hugged for long periods of time, this is quite inconvenient. Especially in some American schools, it is recommended that the baby should not be held for long periods of time and that the baby should get used to it. Indeed, the baby will soon get used to it. But it also develops negative feelings about the world. The baby feels: orum I'm afraid, my needs have to be met, no matter how much I cry, no one comes, this is not a safe place durum There may be situations such as self-esteem, not being able to separate comfortably, and they may need more arms to calm down.
It is important for children to develop the capacity to stay alone. But still need to be careful in infancy. It is not right for babies to be alone for long periods of time, saying, koy I'm putting them on anyway. Kendine Some babies may seem to be left alone for a long time, but perhaps they are trying to get used to receiving as much as they are given, which is quite inconvenient for the future and can have a wide range of negative consequences.
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